Grocery Sackers, Before They Fell in Love

A Cheesy Poem for My Husband Happy Valentine’s Day, Dan the Man (D.J.)! 2/14/10 Tall and scrawny Short sleeves, Tasmanian Devil tie Big white smile, slightly droopy eye Dark blonde hair slicked down Faded green apron double-tied Crooked name tag—Hi, I’m Dan Pushing carts, twelve at a time Paper or plastic, ma’am? Don’t smash my… Continue reading Grocery Sackers, Before They Fell in Love

Excerpts from Yet Another Rejected Romance Novel: Annabelle’s Cure

Sometimes it’s fun to write satirical, awful-on-purpose fiction, especially romance, fantasy, and sci-fi. It makes me laugh. “Serious” romance novels often make me laugh, too. Fifty Shades of Grey, for example, is a laugh riot.   Here are my favorite excerpts from yet another unpublished romance novel—last one, I swear!—by my BFF/alter ego, Michelle Grebo,… Continue reading Excerpts from Yet Another Rejected Romance Novel: Annabelle’s Cure

Excerpts from Another Rejected Romance Novel: He Was More Hillbilly Than Vampire

“Katie had always wanted to date a vampire.”  When I read that opening line in Michelle Grebo’s 132nd unpublished romance novel, He Was More Hillbilly Than Vampire, I knew I was in for a treat.  I don’t usually enjoy paranormal romances, but Michelle was thoughtful enough to name the main character—a shy, potentially impotent vampire—after… Continue reading Excerpts from Another Rejected Romance Novel: He Was More Hillbilly Than Vampire

Excerpts from a Rejected Romance Novel

(Unpublished Masterpieces and Other Tragedies) I have always been interested in the lives of other writers, and the lives of the stories and poems they create. Some of their creations flourish in e-book form on Amazon, or find tangible, paper homes on a Barnes & Noble bookshelf; some hide in the large-print sections of libraries.… Continue reading Excerpts from a Rejected Romance Novel

Fill-in-the-Blank Valentine’s Day Love Poem

For Lazy or Uninspired Men to Give Their Girlfriends or Wives Looking for the perfect way to say “I love you” to your significant other this Valentine’s Day? Maybe you’re too broke to buy a decent Hallmark card. Maybe your identity was recently stolen and you’ve sworn off all online-shopping. Well, at least you’re smart… Continue reading Fill-in-the-Blank Valentine’s Day Love Poem

Hearty Potato Soup Recipe: Easy, Vegetarian, Gluten-free Comfort Food

I hate when I have to scroll down through a blogger’s adorable, rambling story about last weekend in [somewhere REALLY cold] with their kids and [pet’s name], sledding and ice fishing and cavorting with polar bears, just to get to their recipe for hearty, easy potato soup—obviously, the ideal meal after a day spent building… Continue reading Hearty Potato Soup Recipe: Easy, Vegetarian, Gluten-free Comfort Food

Resolutions for 2018: “Excessively Diverted” in a Productive Way

Note about the featured photo: My husband gave me this perfect tote bag for Christmas. (I’m a Jane Austen geek, and I already have the “I [Heart] Mr. Darcy” tote bag.) “I am excessively diverted” is something Elizabeth Bennet says, but also what the invisible sign over my head says whenever I’m completely engrossed in… Continue reading Resolutions for 2018: “Excessively Diverted” in a Productive Way